Here’s a development of thoughts we began on Monday. I’m
very excited about this. I’d love your thoughts and feedback.
Being emotional isn’t in tension with being intellectual.
Intellectuals are emotional about their ideas and about being right.
The real question is what is producing the emotional
reaction in people who aren’t moved by ideas and being right? Is it relational
connection? Is it the closure of a good story? Is it a sense of rightness that
is told in a narrative vs. propositional arguments?
In Exodus, the purpose of priestly garments was “for glory
and for beauty.” Romans 2 says we are to seek for glory and honor and
immortality. Psalm 8 says that being made in God’s image means that we are a
little lower than angels and we are crowned with glory and honor. Maybe
“beauty” is not only a description determined by characteristics that something
has. Maybe beauty is in part indicated by the impact it has on others. Maybe
beauty is a description that indicates that something is showing all who look
at it or think about it that something is ideal in it. Maybe things that are
beautiful actually show us something beyond the ordinary, maybe beauty is a
reflection of God’s image In things. Maybe beauty is an indication of the glory
of something. That It affects others, it impresses and amazes and it puts
people in awe. They have to stop and stare, they are mesmerized. They worship.
They devote themselves to it. Maybe that’s what beauty is and what it’s for.
JBP says that one of the personality trait is broken down
into two different things: apprecitation of ideas vs. appreciation of
aesthetics. This dichotomy might be an indication of non idea driven (non
logically driven assessment of –assessment of things. This would fit with the
idea that there is something aesthetical or beautiful that “non-intellectual”
or “non-logical” people are drawn to moves people very deeply. I also believe
that these other aesthetical or beautiful things that move people are very
logical and rational (meaning that when they are understood they both make
sense and can be explained), but that many people feel the right-ness of it
before they are able to explain it, and many times for various reasons they
don’t end up getting explained.
The more I think about this, the bigger it gets. Appreciation
of aesthetics doesn’t just have to be physically appealing things like beauty.
This is important because when conflict happens in marriage, in friendships, in
churches, in politics, etc. very often the conflict is the result of the two
(or more) people valuing different things, or having a different order of
priority for their values. This also relates to Jordan’s rule 4, which includes
a discussion of the reality that what we focus on is what we see. So often in
the church, conflicts arise because people thing one thing is most important
and that one thing is different from what the leadership thinks is most
important. For instance, which is more important—caring for people or
theological accuracy? Obviously both are important.
So the thing that I would love to discuss further is this:
The issue is not Intellect vs. Emotion. The reality is the
intellectual people get emotional about logic and ideas.
What is it that “emotional” people are getting emotional
about? It’s not that they are emotional, where Intellectual people are not.
Everyone gets emotional—intellectual’s peoples’ emotional commitment to ideas
just doesn’t look like what an “emotional” person’s emotional reaction looks
like. But I think that emotional reactions are actually what both sides have in
common. So what is it that produces the emotional reaction from people on the
“emotional” side of the spectrum? Understanding this would help us to create
new categories for people and lead us to understand them much better. Here are
some suggestions:
What moves non-intellectual people to become emotional?
Beauty—there are people who are moved by and committed to
beautiful things, artistic things, things that are visually compelling.
Relationships—there are people who think that people and
relationships are the most important things
Feelings—there are people who think that how you feel is
most important
CASH VALUE OF THIS IDEA:
Knowing that people are moved by different things can help a
lot when there are disagreements. Maybe the conflict is the result of different
people valuing different things? Maybe the way to engage in conflict is to step
back and ask yourself, “What is it that this other person is valuing? How is
what they are valuing a reflection of something good? How can I affirm the
value of what they are valuing? How can I share what I’m valuing in a way that
is a ‘Yes, and…’ rather than a ‘No, but…’?”
This seems like it could really impact marriages, churches,
friendships. It would lead to much richer conversations.
What do you think? What other things are there that move
people to become emotional?
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