Ephesians 6:4 says that parenting should should be characterized by "the discipline and instruction of the Lord." What is "the instruction of the Lord"?
Instruction is a Greek word that means "counsel about avoidance or cessation of an improper course of conduct." It can be translated "admonition or warning." Here are the other places where the word is used in the New Testament:
Titus 3:10--Reject a factious man after a first and second "warning."
1Co 10:5-11--5 Nevertheless, with most of them God was not pleased, for they were overthrown in the wilderness. 6 Now these things took place as examples for us, that we might not desire evil as they did. 7 Do not be idolaters as some of them were; as it is written, "The people sat down to eat and drink and rose up to play." 8 We must not indulge in sexual immorality as some of them did, and twenty-three thousand fell in a single day. 9 We must not put Christ to the test, as some of them did and were destroyed by serpents, 10 nor grumble, as some of them did and were destroyed by the Destroyer. 11 Now these things happened to them as an example, but they were written down for our instruction, on whom the end of the ages has come.
The verb form of the word is used in these places:
1 Corinthians 4:14 I do not write these things to make you ashamed, but to admonish you as my beloved children.
1 Thessalonians 5:14 And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.
2 Thessalonians 3:15 Do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother.
What is striking is that this word is used to describe how to approach people who are part of God’s family, the church. So the instruction of the Lord is designed for "brothers and sisters and children of the church." Warning people as family members means that they are thought of as part of God's family.
Acts 20:31; Rom 15:14; Col 1:28; Col 3:16 are the other instances where this word is used, and each is a place that describes how to treat people who are in the church.
So the instruction of the Lord is the warning that is given to people who are in God's family. These are people who have a relationship with God. If a relationship with God is a path that we walk on through life, then Ephesians 6:4 uses two terms that help us understand parenting. The Lord's discipline is raising a child to stay on the path of a relationship with God. The Lord's instruction is how you warn your children against leaving the path, or how to warn them if they have left the path.
The Lord has a way of disciplining and instructing his children. Both are tied to God's word and to the Gospel. We've looked at how Hebrews 12 describes the Lord's discipline. What is so moving is that when the Bible describes how Jesus warns us from leaving the path, he does it in a way that flows directly from the Gospel.
Jesus does speak a lot--frankly we need his wisdom and insight for our lives. But even more importantly, Jesus warns us as much through his actions as his words. For every time that we fail to heed God's instruction, for every time we leave the path of our relationship with God, Jesus doesn't just speak to us to warn us, but Jesus went to the cross. In going to the cross, Jesus both shows us the consequences of our sins, AND he shows us that he loves us enough to suffer the consequences of our sins.
Actions speak louder than words, especially when it comes to instruction, warning, and parenting. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Who you are speaks so loudly I can’t hear what you’re saying.” This is often quoted regarding people who are hypocrites. When it comes to Jesus' warnings, though, it takes on a radical new dimension. Our sins aren't just wrong, but they break down the fabric of shalom that God built into the world. The guilt that we feel is designed to be an alarm that calls us back from our sins to restore the peace with God and others and ourselves.
The guilt that we feel, especially the guilt that we feel from the verbal warnings of Jesus, these words that make us wonder if Jesus is a power-hungry, never satisfied perfectionist. But when the sound of Jesus' words is mixed in with his consistent, self-giving love... a self-giving love that compelled him to offer himself on the cross...
...THEN his warnings are swallowed up with hope and possibility and love!
Jesus' death on the cross is the chief way that Jesus instructs/warns us. He takes on our sins and demonstrates his love for us so much so that he sets us free. He warns us as one who is so driven by love that he'll do anything to help us understand. In the backdrop of all his warnings is the assurance of his love, that he has done everything necessary so that our relationship with God is never severed.
Two questions to make this practical:
FIRST: In your life, in your personal relationship with Jesus, have you heard "the instruction of the Lord" in a duet with the cross? Have you heard "the instruction of the Lord" as the cross itself?
Receive it! Hear it! It is true for you! He loves you so much that before you ever heard his warning, he sacrificed himself so that you could be assured of his love and forgiveness.
SECOND: How can you bring this "instruction of the Lord" to life in your parenting? How can your parenting reflect the double way that Jesus warns us—in both words and actions?
For starters, it will mean understanding your kids. Jesus words on the cross come racing to mind: “Father, forgive them. They don’t know what they are doing”(Luke 23:34).
Pray that God would show you. In this you will be following Jesus more deeply, understanding him more personally. Jesus trained disciples. You can connect your parenting to that aspect of his ministry. This is something that will help you know him better.
Help me, Father, to show your love and restoring forgiveness as I instruct my kids!
No comments:
Post a Comment